So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Never joke about your clitoris.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
