he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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