I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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