I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize