God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Randomize