he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize