I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
We need to rekindle our bromance
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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