How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
