Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
