My hair reeks of homosexuality.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
