her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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