Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize