i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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