just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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