Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
So apparently I’m into choking now
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