every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
