Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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