You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
