So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Sorry my hands just texted you
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize