i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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