So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize