one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
