Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
