just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
