Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
