I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
