I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
