btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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