I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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