I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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