There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
someone get that fucking seahorse.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
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