I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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