Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
