so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
