loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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