I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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