ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
