i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
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