you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
