Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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