so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
