Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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