D3 body, D1 cock
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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