Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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