guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
