The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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