he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
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