handjob tips. give me some.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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