some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
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