Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize