Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
