You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
How does it feel to date your dad?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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