I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Farmville is her only friend.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I have post one night stand depression
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
