I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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